Can I force my adult son to change is last name?

My son hasn’t talked or bothered with me in many years. I have granddaughter 6 years old who doesn’t even know who I am.  He had another baby I never also met.  He has no respect and is not blood anymore. I like to have him change his last name to his wife’s name. I want nothing to do anymore. I’m very sick and don’t even know my son in over 10 more years.

ANSWER BY MARGARET CROSS-BELIVEAU:

As the saying goes, “You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family.”  Declaring that he isn’t your son, doesn’t change the fact that you gave birth to him.  Just because you don’t want to act like his mother, or vice versa, doesn’t mean you aren’t biologically mother and son.  You can’t force him to change is name.  Just like an ex-husband can force an ex-wife to drop her married name and go back to her maiden name.  If you really hate him so much that you can’t stand having a shared last name, you can change your own name.

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Legal Disclaimer: Please note that this answer does not constitute legal advice, and should not be relied on since each situation is fact specific, and it is impossible to evaluate a legal problem without a comprehensive consultation and review of all the facts and documents at issue. This answer does not create an attorney-client relationship. A lawyer experienced in the subject area and licensed to practice in the jurisdiction should be consulted for legal advice.

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The estate administration and estate planning attorneys at the Beliveau Law Group provide legal services for estate planning, probate, estate administration, and trust administration. The law firm has offices and attorneys in Naples, Florida; Waltham, Massachusetts; and Salem, New Hampshire.

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