Uncle Sam’s New Year’s Resolutions

As new year’s celebrations are in the rearview mirror, it’s nice to continue celebrating the resolutions that we are definitely going to achieve! So we asked Uncle Sam – yes that Uncle Sam – what his new year’s resolutions were.

This is what he told us…

  • Help the federal government spend less money than it collects. If your family needs to make sure it only spends what it makes, why shouldn’t I do the same thing in my federal home? One can only dream…
  • All 50 states using the same taxation rules. When at state gatherings, my head starts to spin when states tell me all their rules. One state taxes pumpkins you carve, but not ones you eat. Some states let every single city set their sales tax rates, while others don’t tax sales at all! 50 states, 50 sets of very different rules. Ugh. I resolve to do my best to get these guys to unify their rules!
  • Let’s all be friends…with a limit. I keep inviting everyone to my parties, but only half show up when I send out the invite list. I don’t get it. I resolve to upgrade my food and beverage choices if you all promise to show up, be pleasant and have a good time. Oh, and not that I don’t love you all, but how about some end to everyone’s terms…Your states need you too!
  • Be more unplugged. With all the entertainment and creativity in the news today, it is hard not to be bombarded all the time. I resolve to stay unplugged more often and just talk to others. It may be difficult, but I will start with one day, then try for two. Maybe even try an entire week.
  • Think for myself. And, considering the news stuff I read and see every day, I resolve to think for myself instead of getting caught up in being told what to think about an event. I know, how can I do this when EVERYONE is so focused on telling me what to think instead of presenting the facts and letting me figure it out for myself.
  • No more last-minute changes. I resolve to set the tax rules for the year BEFORE the year starts. Stop laughing! I really mean it this time.
  • Continued generosity. The pandemic has shown that there are still plenty of people who don’t think twice about helping those who find themselves in unfortunate situations. So I resolve to do a better job of helping, even when not asked.
  • I resolve to resolve. I know, a lot of my resolutions were the same as last year and the year before. Therefore, I, Uncle Sam, resolve to keep my resolutions for at least one day…this time.

Thanks, Uncle Sam! With all the hardships last year, it’s always nice to find a way to smile, even if for a brief moment.

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